Gabby C
by Beyond Dreamer
Summary: Is everything alright? You feeling moldy? You feeling lonely? You're not the only.. Is everthing alright? You feeling stormy? You feeling phony? You're not the only. - Animal Collective
1. Chapter 1

For anyone reading Phoenix I'm going to be working on that again too. I'm sorry for disappearing. My life has just been really crazy busy. It's slowed down a little and I've missed writing. This idea pretty much came out of nowhere. I've been wanting to write for awhile now. Thank you so much for the support! =)

**Bourbon St.**

The street was a river of drunk men and women of all different age, color, and shapes. Fear struck instantly, and everything in the petite teenager told her to turn around and run as fast as her legs could take her. Instinctively, her arms wrapped around her small frame as she began walking further and further away from the dark Porsche, wanting to both laugh and cry.

Brown eyes stayed away from the mostly naked women shaking their asses outside of the bars, luring anyone drunk or desperate enough to want a lap dance, in. This was nothing like she'd imagine. Coming from a small Mississippi town, this was HUGE, a mighty culture shock, she walked a bit faster wondering how the many police officers could just stand around and allow them to openly caress their bodies. Nothing like this would be allowed back home.

This was... wrong.

Mostly everyone who walked by had a drink in their hand, she wasn't a fan of alcohol, didn't smoke, and for religious reasons, was saving herself for marriage, the vow reflected with a purity ring worn on her left hand; the brunette had no idea what she was doing on Bourbon street. A wrong turn on the interstate could be blamed, but it was her decision not to get off and turn around, heading back to her best friend's house like originally planned- No, that would have been too easy.

Curiosity was to blame. A few of her peers had ventured out to the infamous party street, bringing back with them adventurous stories and a bad hang over, for some reason, she had always wanted to see it for herself. A completely new world outside of small town country life. She had done a lot of traveling with her parents, but that was different. Her parents sheltered her from places like this, explaining they were for people who didn't have God in their life.

A golden cross hung from her neck, and there wasn't a church in sight. Even the clothing on her body seemed to be standing out, a lot of the other women barely wearing anything, she was beginning to think this wasn't a good idea. _I don't belong here, _She thought watching two men openly make out by one of the many bars. _I have to get out of here. _

Fear struck and her stride became more persistent, the nervous teenager walked off the street and onto the sidewalk, eying the many bars lined up in front of her. The signs on some were inviting, momentarily capturing her interest with bright neon lighting- Stopping dead in her tracks, she looked around realizing she had no idea where she parked. _Lord help me... _

"ID." The deep voice of the tall security guard got her attention. Turning her head, she watched a couple standing at the door of a bar reach into their pockets, fishing for their wallets.

The tall man's eyes found hers, greeting her stoically. With a timid smile, she walked away wanting to beat her head up against a wall. Why hadn't being 18 crossed her mind? Surely, there wouldn't be anything for a 17 year old to do. Guessing by all the police officers, she assumed all the bars were keeping an eye out for minors- Did she even want to venture into one?

Discouraged and scared- finding her car was the only thing occupying her thoughts. A light sheen of sweat began coating her smooth skin, she didn't know how long she'd been searching, but her legs were begging for a break. A place on a nearby corner captured her eye.

Rainbow flags gently swayed in the light breeze, techno music blared from two establishments sitting across from each other, there were attractive shirtless men standing on the balcony- Her preacher talked about these two places every now and then. Pub and Oz, for the homosexuals. Bits and pieces of southern decadence talk came to mind, protesting- She couldn't remember enough to understand. Magnolia wasn't too far from New Orleans, they made a big deal about Bourbon St, drinking, and... homosexuality.

There were a few in her school, but she didn't really know any of them. A couple of family members were, but they were all distant, living their lives far far away from hers. The same curiosity that brought her to the party street, also brought her to the doors of pub. There were no guards requesting for ID.

Hesitantly, she walked inside.

The room was foggy with cigarette smoke, filled mostly with men, many dancing, others just standing around with a drink in their hands talking to the person beside them. The brunette's jaw dropped watching one blonde haired man lean over to passionately kiss another dark haired man. A blush violently painted her face red as she walked a little faster through the crowd, stopping at a staircase.

Two young men walked down flashing her a kind smile before walking off. The teenager took a quick breath and then carefully walked up the steep staircase, eyes widening as she reached the top.

The second story was mostly dance floor and flashing lights, bodies crowded the room, moving to the blaring trance music. All of a sudden aware of her staring, she looked away from the two kissing men and found a lonely table to sit at.

Watching two men was... different. She didn't know how to feel about any of this, maybe she wasn't as adventurous as she thought. At the moment, she felt like a lost scared little girl wanting her Mommy and Daddy. They'd kill her if they ever found out she sat in a Bourbon St. gay club.

Especially her father.

Famous Christian Rock star Raife Davies would be furious! She'd most likely be back on a bicycle, her Porsche given to charity. _God, I am so sorry. Please help me fi- _"Hello Beautiful," A deep voice in her ear brought her attention back to the bar, looking up she met bloodshot eyes, _Oh Heavens, what else could go wrong?_ "Dance with me."

The smell of the man's breath was repulsive. Beer was the worst thing for the mouth, and from the way he held onto the table to keep his balance, it was obvious he had drank a lot of it. "No thank you." She politely declined, her soft voice bearing a gentle hint of a Southern accent. _Please God, make this man go away... _

A rough hand landed on her thigh, frustration starting to form the young guys face. Her body tensed up freezing under the unexpected touch. _Why did I come here? Lord, what a mess I have gotten myself into..._"Come on, don't be shy."

"Please, I really-"

A glass was placed on the table, grabbing the teenager's and the drunk man's attention. Brown eyes trailed up a slender arm, stopping at a pair of dark aviators.

"Go away!" The man yelled over the loud music, "We're busy."

His words meant nothing to the blonde and his presence was completely ignored as she released the glass, moving around the table. Brown eyes stayed fixated on dark aviators, watching them approach... until her breath caught. Gentle hands landed on her knees, slowly moving up as she bent down. The kiss was unexpected, but for reasons she couldn't explain, it was returned.

Their lips moved softly against each other, a pleasant mint flavor filling the teenagers mouth. Her hands gripped the bar stool tightly, knuckles white, all rational thought disappeared along with the rest of the universe. Her soft touch against her face, teasing her skin so sweetly. Nothing was rushed, the lips tasting hers savoring, sweetly devouring each breath leaving her lungs- And just as they came, they vanished.

"He's gone."

Brown eyes fluttered opened. The world came crashing down and realization struck, hard. His hand burning through her thigh, squeezing harder, his beer stained breath, the hungry look in his bloodshot eyes, the missing car, her parents, boyfriend! The woman in her arms attempted to pull away, "No!" She yelled from the top of her lungs grasping desperately at her arm, tears forming, "Please don't go," She begged fear replacing...

The blonde stared a moment, examining the girl with terror filled eyes. It was that same expression that brought her to the brunette in the first place. She looked absolutely terrified of the man sitting beside her. Knowing it was pointless to argue with a drunk, she did the next best thing. Convinced him the young brunette was just another dyke, it never seemed to fail. "Where are your friends?" She calmly asked, reaching back without breaking eye contact.

"I-I came alone." She stammered, the tears rolling down one after another. How pathetic she felt desperately holding onto this stranger. The thought of being alone had her panicked. What if someone else came along and what if they were more aggressive? She wouldn't be able to protect herself, hell! She couldn't even leave this god awful place! "Please don't go! I-I- He-"

"Shhh," The blonde interrupted bringing the glass up to her lips with one hand while wiping the tears away with the other. "Drink this. It'll help calm you down."

Without any hesitation, she downed the shot glass filled with jager, chocking on the brown liquid setting a fire down her throat. "That's awful!" She dropped the glass wincing at the intense taste in her mouth. Shaking her head, she found the strangers face with a scowl. "How was that supposed to make me feel better?"

"You stopped crying, didn't you?" Amusement laced the quick comment, the blonde couldn't stop the smile from shaping her lips. The poor girl looked as though her own puppy had just bit her. A betrayed sad angry look on her face.

It was cute.

"Yes and now I want to puke."

"Just after one?" The blonde attempted to move, and quickly remembered the steel grip the girl had on her arm. "You don't drink, do you?" The brunette shook her head confirming the blonde's suspicions. It made her wonder. Why was someone who doesn't drink alone on Bourbon St? Judging by the youthful features gazing up at her, it was likely the girl simply wasn't old enough. _Must be 19 or 20, _Upon further investigation, the girl's attire seemed a bit too conservative for Bourbon. The cross... _ohhhhh_. "Are you one of those obnoxious bible pamphlet fuckers?" The alcohol and the small bit of drugs in her system meant no filters! She didn't give a fuck who she was offending- Until she felt the girl tense up again, the grip on her arm quickly retreating, the tears... _Oh shit. _"I didn't mean, fuck."

_Oh Lord, why did I get myself into such a big mess! I just want to go back home and get into my bed and forget this whole thing! _Burying her face into her hands, heavy sobs wracked her body. _I don't belong here! _The arms wrapping around her small frame made her freeze up, "Shhh, It's okay, you're going to be okay." She melted into the stranger's embrace completely falling apart.

Awkwardly, the blonde ran a hand over soft brunette curls. _Shit, _Behind dark aviators, she watched the girl she had been dancing with shoot bullets at her from across the room. The tall red head lit a fire of desire within her and just as she was about to taste those supple lips, she caught the guy out of the corner of her eye. What made her turn her head? She wasn't sure, but the look on the girl's face worried her. Without a word, she left the red head and kissed the girl crying in her arms instead. "That's it, just breathe. You're okay." _Sorry, _She mouthed to the fuming woman openly staring at her, not really caring. She was too fucked up to feel bad. "Lets get out of here." She suggested feeling the brunette's sobs begin to subside.

The teenager slowly pulled away, wiping her eyes. "I'm so sor-sorry." The words came out an embarrassed stammer. A blush crept on her face, the stranger's vest and exposed midriff were soaked in her tears. "I'm a mess."

"It's okay." The blonde helped her off the seat, almost losing her balance in the process. "I am too."

The air outside- Well it seemed there was no air with the crowd of people flooding the street. The blonde's hand never left the brunette's back as she led them down Bourbon not really sure where they were going. The ecstasy in her pocket and another drink was the only coherent thought in her head. "This isn't working." She muttered as some guy rudely bumped into her. Large crowds mostly annoyed her, especially drunk ones.

The brunette stayed close to the taller girl's side, feeling... safe. With a side glance, she drank up the sight the darkness of the bar had kept hidden. The stranger, whose name was a complete mystery, had long flawless blonde hair, not a strand out of place. The aviators stayed in place over her eyes- With a blush, she looked away from the dark lenses.

"Something on my face?" A smile followed the casual inquire as they turned off Bourbon, walking onto one of the many side roads.

"Sorry, that was rude of me."

"Don be litl lady, we all be makin mistakes every now an again, ya hear?" All embarrassment disappeared. Amusement now painted the girl's face as she turned hear head, meeting a big toothy grin.

"Are you making fun of me?" The question was playful, but she was in a bit of awe at how her fake accent sounded a lot like the people back home. The other girl nonchalantly turned her head, breaking eye contact. "I would never disrespect a Southern Belle, especially one believing in the good ol faith."

Unconsciously, a hand went up to the golden cross around her neck. She idly played with the charm, quietly thinking. "I don't hate you." She carefully worded, thinking back to their kiss. Another blush covered her face, "I know a lot of people who do," The people at her church came to mind, her parents... "But I don't."

_But you spread hate. _The thought came out of nowhere and even in her drunken stupor, she couldn't help but feel a bit of annoyance. She didn't know for sure, but the girl she led around the quarter came off as one of the many ignorant christian assholes who went around Bourbon preaching hate. Why else would someone like her be on Bourbon? She wasn't looking to get fucked or fucked up, there would be no other explanation... Right?

"Of course you don't." Speaking an octave above a mutter, she reached for the golden cross. "Because you're my beautiful girlfriend." With little force, she lured the younger girl by the necklace, capturing her lips in a gentle kiss. Feeling a slight tremor in the body she held, the blonde pulled away, throwing a quick glance to her right. "Isn't she beautiful?"

The brunette watched the exchange, between the stranger and a bouncer standing outside a bar, in a daze of confusion. _I'm not your girlfriend... _The tall muscular man looked at her smiling. "She's very beautiful." His arm moved for the door. "Enjoy your evening."

"Thank you."

Still being led by the gold charm, the young brunette silently entered the bar. It was different from the night club. Men and women either played pool or sat drinking at the bar. The older woman released her walking casually to one of the empty bar stools. "I'll have vodka." Brown eyes slightly widened at the 100 bill she dropped.

"Just vodka?" The bar tender asked taking the money.

"And a coke in a separate glass please."

"That's an expensive drink." The awe in the girl's voice was mirrored in her eyes.

"I don't make your average income." She briefly explained motioning for the under age girl to have a seat.

"Doctor?" She playfully questioned taking the offer.

Two glasses were placed in front of them. "Not quite."

"Lawyer?"

"Pharmacist." Reaching into one of her pockets, the blonde pulled out a small silver case. Steady fingers pressed the latch revealing an assortment of different pills.

"You shouldn't do that." The young girl's voice went into one ear and out the other as she downed a small white tablet with a healthy swallow of vodka.

"There's a lot of things I shouldn't do." The young brunette filled her vision. The conservative clothing and behavior took little away from her beauty. A hunger set in as her eyes lowered, admiring the girl sitting dangerously close beside her. _Fuck the good ol faith. "_Like kiss you," She whispered softly caressing the side of the girl's face with one hand.

"Why not?" The words were whispered back, tickling her lips. They were so close from the innocent pair wanting to be captured.

"Because," Blue eyes lowered. "This isn't you." Casually, she turned on her seat, facing the bar. "Drink your coke." Quietly, she brought her own drink to her lips.

The brunette did what she was told, trying to calm her shaky hands. Every nerve in her body seemed to be going haywire, the stranger ordering another drink to blame. No guy has every made her feel this way, the butterflies in her stomach very new, she didn't know how to settle them, it scared her. "I should go home." The words were shaky, unsure. "But I'm lost."

"Well then Dorthy, lets go find that yellow brick road."

The world seemed a bit more shaky and swirly than she last remembered. It's amazing how vodka could change the dynamics of ground. "Are you going to be okay?" The concern wasn't lost on the blonde enjoying the wave of warmth running through her system. The high starting from the tip of her head to the end of her toes, having the arm around her waist steadying each step enhancing the sensations.

"Yes, walking is just a bad idea right now. You smell really good by the way." How had she not noticed it before? The girl in her arm filled every sense in her body, the light vanilla scent making her more appetizing. "Catch this carriage coming by." She whispered in her ear, very softly kissing the tender lobe. The vanilla became more alive as she ran her nose behind her ear, tickling the skin there.

"Excuse me, Sir. We need a ride." Blonde hair abruptly swayed as she lifted her head. Where were they? What the hell were they doing? Why was there a fucking horse staring at her? "The driver wants to know where we're headed." Blinking a moment, that's all she could seem to do staring into brown inquisitive eyes. "You're lost too aren't you?" They changed, becoming more worried, fearful.

"No," _I just can't help but think how bad I want to fuck you right now. _"I know exactly where to go." She declared proudly, smiling just as proud. She stepped onto the tall carriage with the help of the younger brunette, settling onto the wooden bench seat. "Lets have a tour of the city."

The driver began speaking, telling stories of every street they slowly strolled through. A smile of amusement was firmly placed on her face as she stared out into the city, listening to the young girl beside her ask question after question after question. The awe and amazement in her voice got her chuckling from time to time, earning her an amused 'what?' from the brunette. Leaning forward, she stole a kiss, murmuring 'nothing' as she sat back and turned her head, facing the city once more.

It seemed she could feel her blood rushing through her body, the pressure almost begging to be released. The brunette slightly readjusted beside her, sitting closer than before, driving her absolutely crazy. The ecstasy gaining more and more control of her actions, she wanted to devour every inch of the olive skin touching her own. "You're knuckles are white." A new warmth invaded her senses as a slightly smaller hand began caressing her tense one. She looked down watching the brunette lightly knead the skin there with gentle fingertips.

She stopped them, taking the girl's hand in her own. "I used to wear one of these." She looked into the girl's face, watching closely, removing the silver from her finger. There was no sign of discomfort, she looked down, examining the purity ring with a smirk. It closely resembled one she wore in her teenage years. Everyone in her Catholic High School wore one. Hardly anyone respected what it stood for. She was one of those people. Lost her virginity at 16 to a boyfriend, and then again that same year to a girl. "Stop the carriage."

After paying the driver, she walked with more control to a black iron gate, digging in her back pocket for a small set of keys. The brunette was quiet as she unlocked the gate. "Where are we?" The blonde closed the gate behind them, smiling in the darkness.

"My backyard." There was a large fountain in the corner of the yard, in front, a large bed-like lounge facing the mini waterfall. Out of the public eye, the blonde sunk further into the ecstasy, walking behind the brunette. "Isn't it breath taking?" She pressed her body into the younger girl's, caressing her hips with her hands. "So serene, refreshing."

A slight moan escaped her parted lips, she had planned on stopping the hands wandering up and down her body, but moaned instead feeling those hands lightly brush over her breasts. The mouth whispering sweetly in her ear was now on her neck, kissing up and down her throat. "I want you, I want to taste you, touch you, I want be inside you, I want to be so deep inside you, until you scream and beg me to stop. Has anyone ever taken you like that before?"

"No." She sighed, her body humming with desire, overwhelmed with yearn.

"Good." With one hand, she cupped the brunette's breast, and with the other, cupped her face, taking her lips in a searing kiss.

**Bluish**

_Why so bright? I hate the sun, I hate that I have no curtains, I hate morning hangovers, I hate- _Blue eyes opened, wincing at the morning light, she fought back a groan. Everything hurt, mostly her head, and she was sore and- There was a bluish dildo erect between her thighs. Eyes wide, pain ignored, she shot up into a sitting position looking to her right. There was a body lying next to her, a body she was trying very hard to remember. A fully clothed body, she discovered gently lifting the covers. "Hey."

"Hm?" The body mumbled sleepily.

"You have to get up." There was no playfulness in her voice, the pounding in her head along with confusion and annoyance making her irritable. "I have places to go, and unfortunately, people to see."

It took the brunette a second to realize where she was waking up and who she was waking up to. A blush filled her cheeks and she looked away from the blonde taking the strap on off. The night before had been crazy, and incredible, crazily incredible. The blonde did what she had wanted, and surprisingly, it wasn't rushed or painful. She took her time exploring her body, teasing her, turning her into a virgin begging for more, and she complied taking her body to heights unimaginable more than once in different rooms of the house. She had fallen asleep only to wake up shortly after to the blonde tasting or touching a new part of her body.

"Did you hear me?" The question was asked from the corner of the room. The blonde was digging in her dresser, back to the brunette sitting in bed, daydreaming. "I have to go," She turned around facing the teen. "So do you."

"I'm lost." She explained almost helplessly. "You told me last night you'd help me find my car. I saw it last night on the carriage ride. I typed in the name of the Hotel I parked by on my phone."

"That works. We'll just leave after my shower." Grabbing a towel, she turned her head before stepping into the bathroom. "You can join if you want."

"No thank you."

Another blush followed the answer, the blonde couldn't believe she'd even slept with the seemingly shy girl. "We did sleep together right?" She couldn't help but ask, foggy memories came up but she didn't know if they were real or maybe a dream... "I did wake up wearing hypnotic."

"Hypnotic?" Pointing to the bluish toy sitting on the dresser, it dawned on her who or what hypnotic was. Even with a blush, she couldn't help but smile in amusement. "You named it?"

"Yeah, don't you name yours?"

"I don't have any." She responded with a brief head shake. "My parents would kill me."

"Yeah well, you're not a teenager anymore. You're old enough to not have to worry about what they think." For some reason, the way the brunette quickly looked away bothered her. The clothes she was holding in her hands fell as it dawned on her. _Oh shit. _"You are old enough... right?" The question had nothing to do with her parents.

The brunette understood and looked everywhere but at the staring blonde. She could feel her eyes burning holes into her skin, she opened her mouth just ready to agree with the blonde, but it was too late. She was a horrible liar. "Fuck me, you're just a kid!" Running a hand through her hair, the blonde began pacing. "I fucked some little kid last night-"

"I'm not a little kid!"

"You're a little girl in high school, you know nothing about the real world and your terrified of your parents." Burying her face into her hands, she groaned. "And I fucked you. You're parents could sue the shit out of me." Looking around, she laughed. "This house could be yours and you could fucking visit me from time to time in a fucking jail cell with my roommate Sam the big butch momma of the house-"

"Has this crossed your mind before?" The brunette interrupted slightly hurt and also amused by the blonde's behavior. "The last thing I'd ever tell my parents is how I slept with a woman in New Orleans."

"Speaking of," The blonde took the ring off her hand, approaching the bed. She didn't remember ever putting it on, in her fucked up state of mind, she must have thought it'd be hilarious fucking Ashley while wearing her promise to God. "This is yours."

"Thank you." The brunette murmured taking the ring. She put it back in place and didn't feel right wearing it, not after everything she had done with- "What's your name?" The question stopped the blonde from entering the bathroom. She looked over her shoulder. "Gabby. Yours?"

"Ashley."

"It's nice to meet you, Ashley." She smirked. "I'm going to take a shower now. I need to put some clothes on, you're barely old enough for rated R movies much less live action porn."

The brunette couldn't help but laugh at the outrageous statement. There was little joy in the outburst, just bitterness. "Don't you think it's a little too late for that?" Without another word, Spencer walked into the other room, leaving Ashley alone on the bed.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I really want to finish this too. :D I really appreciate all the support, thanks everyone. **

Behind dark aviators, blue eyes watched the petite girl sob beside her in the dark leather passenger seat. She had a hard time understanding the morning. Waking up to the... Teenager, god the thought still bothered her. It would have been nice to know before hand she was dealing with a child. She wouldn't have done anything, fucked up or not, but help the girl find her car, sleeping with her wouldn't have crossed her mind for the slightest second.

The slim cell phone in her tight jeans went off. She answered casually watching the girl begin to cry harder, a neatly waxed eye brow raised. "Hello?"

The voice on the other end stayed quiet for a couple of seconds. "Do I want to know?" Paige, her dear friend back in las Angelas, inquired with a strange mixture of curiosity and concern.

"I don't even want to know." She mumbled running a hand through her hair, moving her eyes to the empty space in the street where the girl's car should have been. "I'm babysitting."

The smile could be heard over the phone and she found her friend chuckling in her ear. The girl beside her shot her a dark angry look. "Don't quit your day job, Gabby." The name was spoken playfully, the blonde took the oppurtunity to mouth 'are you hungry?' to the the teenager now staring at her as if she had grown a second and third head.

"I wasn't planning on it. I'm going to get the kid a happy meal. I'll call you back later, Paigy." Exchanging quit goodbyes, she hung up keeping her eyes on the road.

"I'm dead." The brunette's tears started back up again and she couldn't take them anymore. They made her feel bad and uncomfortable, and she really didn't know what to make of them. She was used to dealing with grown ups, and was never put in a situation with someone as sensitive as... As... She never was good with names.

"I know this really good diner and I promise you the best breakfast in the world and your car back if you please stop crying."

"Y-you know who has my car?"

The girl's voice was so quiet and hopeful, she held up her hand briefly glancing at the cross around her neck. "I swear on Jesus' dead, reborn, and then dead again soul that I know where your car is at. Mommy and Daddy will never know you were out here, Darling. Pinky promise."

Despite the tears, the brunette couldn't help but smile smally, offered pinky. "You act like I'm 5."

"You cry like your 5." She shot back playfully, relieved to have settled the teenager's anxiety. The poll reading 'violaters will be towed' clued her in on where to find the vanished vehicle.

Pulling into the parking lot of the diner, she walked quietly next to Ashley as they entered the restaraunt. The place was busy, customers and waitresses buslted around full tables and booths. A smile turned her lips as she caught a tall red head's eye. "Get us a booth and make it two of whatever you order."

Walking away before the girl could question her actions, she followed the red haired waitress out a back door.

Ashley watched them walk out of the building and followed them with her eyes out the window. Gabbys jeep was illegally tinted, for obvious reasons she concluded watching them disappear into the back seat. "Table for one?" She met the kind eyes of an older woman and smiled.

"Two. My friend will be in in a minute." The woman whose name tag read 'Darlene' smiled again and brought her to an empty booth coming back for her drink and food orders. She did what she was told and ordered for two.

The empty seat across from her was soon filled. The evidence of what transpired in the blonde's jeep was smeared onto her lips. A pink shade that matched the red head's. It also stained the skin on her neck. "Do you just go around sleeping with people?" She couldn't keep the disgust out of her tone. "With... Girls?"

"I have friends all over." Sitting back, slender fingers wrapped around a cold glass of orange juice, bringing it up to her lips, blue eyes examined the young brunette carefully. She looked angry like she had done something wrong. "Is someone jealous?" The comment was playful almost sing song like.

Ashley looked down wanting to disappear. She did feel jealous, and she was mad and hurt. Even her body was sore from spending a night with the blonde, and she didn't care about her. She wasn't sure what she was thinking allowing this stranger to have her body. It was obvious that's all she wanted, kicking her out in the early morning, calling her a kid, fucking a waitress not too long after- The tears started again and they wouldn't stop. She felt embarrassed, used and stupid and this person across from her didn't give a fuck. Didn't even know her name.

She wanted to go home.

"Aww, shame on you. This little precious thing is too pretty to make cry like this."

Perplexed blue eyes narrowed at the waitress as she set the plates down. "Do you really feel that comment was helpful?" Darlene gave her a stern stare and shook her head walking away from the table. She rolled her own eyes focusing on the brunette. "I didn't mean to upset you again. If I hurt your feelings in any way shape or form I really am sorry." Wet brown eyes looked up at her. "Look, our breakfast is smiling up at us." She grinned at the pancake faces. "And another positive, we have blueberry, strawberry and maple syrup. Life is good."

"I just want to go home." Taking the fork, she mostly moved food around her plate. There was no appetite, just deep regret and fear.

They ate silently and neither of them spoke on the way to the car impound. Ashley stayed mostly inside of her head feeling stupid and ashamed. The process was quick ending in Gabby giving the front desk attendant money.

The car was pulled to the front of the building. "Is this it?" Ashley nodded as the attendant gave his goodbyes handing her the keys.

"Thanks for everything." She told the blonde feeling more awkward than anything. The way her eyes avoided hers went along very well with the thick tension surrounding them.

The brunette's tone wasn't thankful, it was more bitter and 'I hate you go die' would have fit like the perfect puzzle piece. "No problem." There wasn't anything left to say. She had found the yellow brick road, made her feel like the evil witch, and was on her way home. Mission accomplished."Have a good day." She turned back to her jeep and slipped inside watching the curly haired girl drive away. "What a day." Was her first thought, and 'I need a drink.' Was her second.

With on eye closed and her head tilted at just the right angle, she managed to operate a vehicle, after visiting most of the bars from New Orleans to Magnolia Mississippi, driving drunk wasn't so hard. A huge sigh of relief escaped her as she pulled up to her childhood home.

The property hadn't changed much. It was still your typical big white country home with a wrap around porch, plenty of trees, and lots of people. A frown shaped her lips. On top of being completely drunk, she would have to meet and speak with people she would surely know. Magnolia wasnt very big, chances were nobody but her left and everyone else was at her mother's house celebrating.

She never came back after leaving. Her and her mother skyped and the older blonde hated hearing about her life since leaving Magnolia. She left a very religeous house hold to follow her dreams of becoming successful and famous. Being the high functioning alcoholic that she was, she walked straight and acted pretty damn sober.

"My baby!" She smiled as her mother came running toward her from the backyard. The house didn't have a fence anywhere, all three acres were open making it easy for the blonde to spot her getting out of the black jeep. "Oh I've missed you so much!" Hundreds of kisses were planted all over her face, bringing a big drunk smile to her face.

"I missed you too, Mom." The older blonde brought her to arms length looking her up and down.

"You've gotten so big, and your accent is completely gone." She spoke in playful amazement. "What happened to my country baby?"

"Bad for business. I didn't want to be the Dolly Parton of the porn industry." The look on her mother's face was absolutely priceless. She enjoyed bringing the subject up, loved seeing her mother's speechless expression.

"I still love you my baby. I don't care too much for the other you, but I love you dearly my Darling." A gentle pat to the face followed the sentimental words, and she rolled her eyes behind dark sun glasses.

"Love you too."

Her mother chuckled, blue eyes sparkling in the sunlight, she couldn't remember the last time she had seen her mother so happy. "It always kills you to say that. I thought I had raised a loving baby. When you were two I couldn't get-"

The sound of glass shattering made two blonde heads abruptly turn. Standing not too far, on the porch, was a very familiar young lady standing in a bikini swim suit, staring as if she had just seen the ghost of mother Theresa herself.

The blonde wore the same expression, and she was beginning to feel what it was like to be completely and utterly speechless. Not even the alcohol could calm her inner panic and confusion. "Oh I'm so glad you came out here!" Her mother urged her frozen body closer to the obviously frozen brunette. "Spencer you will never guess who this young lady is!"

"I don't want to know." The older blonde chuckled heartily at her non joke. There was very little funny about the situation.

"It's Ashley, Darling." She spoke in a way that was supposed to make her feel excited and happy to see the teenager. It didn't work. Every now and then, she'd sometimes wonder what it would be like to faint. She was sure the pre fainting sympthoms were there.

"You're Spencer?" Ashley asked looking confused and kind of horrified. When no answer was given Paula decided to speak for her all of a sudden shy daughter. "Yes, dear. Hasn't my baby grown?" She laughed joyously near her ear. Spencer was finding it hard to keep up. Memories flooded her mind and she all of a sudden felt very sick. "This is your old baby sitter, Spencer. She took very good care of you when you were-"

"I'm very drunk," Pale, and in a very fucked up episode of the twilight zone, she spoke hastily just wanting to walk away for a few seconds, hours, years- Needing time to process everything. "And I'm going to go be sick in the toilet now." Not waiting for a response she walked past everyone looking in her direction, zeroing in on a large bottle of wine sitting in the kitchen.

Grabbing the merlot, she walked into the bathroom with no plans of reemerging.

Ever.

_"Do you think I'll ever like the dark?" _

_Not looking up from the sketch pad in her arms, she reached up for the light switch. "Just count the stars, purple paper eater." The ceiling lit up with what seemed like hundreds of bright glowing stars in the darkness. _

_"I don't eat paper anymore, Spencer!" The child corrected giggling from across the room. "I stopped at 3!" _

_"I never had a problem with your paper eating." She closed the sketchbook. "Now we'd have a problem if you were sniffing glue." Placing the book down on the desk, she stood up. Spending hours sketching different big cities was becoming an obsession. Leaving the small Mississippi town was her biggest obsession, she wasn't sure where she wanted to go or what she wanted to do, but she planned on figuring it all out. _

_Soon. _

_"Before you fall asleep from counting all the stars, and I want you to tell me exactly how many there are in the morning, I have something I've been meaning to talk to you about." _

_"I don't eat paper anymore." She whined and in the darkness she tousled her curly hair. "Or sniff glue." _

_"I know. Ive never bought you a stick of glue and I never will." The blonde reached into the night stand and pulled out a flash light. "There once was a town of bloody zombies who had just-"_

_"No scary stories Spencer!" The teenager laughed removing the light from under her chin. Shining the light on her little buddy, the 5 year old sat up from a sea of pillows and began making funny shadow puppets on the wall. A pang of sadness hit her out of nowhere, it was so strange how they bonded over the years. She had known the girl with the crazy curls for all of her young life. Her mother and her took care of her often, whenever her father and mother toured all over as world famous Christian rock stars. _

_"I'm going to quit school." The young girl's shadow puppets died as Spencer threw the light aside, all jokes set along with it. "And I'm going to leave here, soon." There was enough light for her to see the confusion. "But you're going to be starting school soon, after this summer and you'll make lots of new friends-" _

_"I don't want new friends." The brunette leaped into her lap wrapping her tiny arms around her neck. "I just want you to be my friend. I don't want you to leave. Everyone leaves... It's not fair!"_

_"We'll always be friends, best friends." She never cried but for some reason she really wanted to. The kid was not making the conversation easy. "Ashley ill visit all the time and I'll call everyday. You'll always see me, always. So much that you'll get sick of my face."_

_The brunette giggled. "Promise?"_

_"Double, triple, quadruple, promise. I'll visit so much you'll have to beg me to leave because ill be atrociously annoying."_

_"What if I wanted to come visit you?" _

_"That's fine too. I'll send a post card with my address so you can come visit me anytime you want."_

_"Scooby doo?" She asked excitedly. _

_The teenager chuckled. "Wouldn't you rather some cool iconic landmark? Like the Eiffel tower?"_

_"You can't live In Paris!" The little girl abrupted In loud laughter. "You don't eat frogs!" _

_"But I eat snails." She urged the little girl back into bed, tucking her In. _

_"Gross!" _

_"Remember count all the stars and keep your eyes open for aliens." She tousled her curly hair once more before getting off the bed. "I'll leave both our doors open and keep the hallway light on in case you decide to sleep walk and find paper to eat." _

_"I don't eat paper anymore!" _

_Spencer chuckled. "Night kiddet." _

_"Night Spencer!" _


	3. Chapter 3

Sheer panic arose at feeling water hit her face, eyes wide, frantically looking around, the sight of her mother standing over her filled her vision. Lying in a bathtub with merlot between her thighs, she looked back up watching the reason she was wet kneel beside her. "You are an evil woman." Only the older blonde could get away with turning the shower head on while she slept. Rubbing her tired eyes, she allowed her head to fall back against the cold tile wall staring into the blue that mirrored her own.

"You missed your coming home party." Speaking casually didn't hide the hurt disappointment she knew was there. How long had she planned this party? Since agreeing she would stay a summer with her two months before? "I know you are the last person on the planet to have social anxiety, what's wrong with you?" The tone was quickly changing and she very much felt like a scolded child. "And you pull up drunk? And your driving drunk? How could you after what happened-"

"I do it all the time." Disaster, everything seemed disasterous, now she was hurting her mother even more with a topic sensitive to both of them. "It's fun." How ridiculous she sounded but her pride refused to hear anymore, and her heart felt the same. Wanting to avoid the subject, she hated the sadness that came along with it, she would say anything to end the drinking and driving conversations. "Why did you want me here so badly?"

The silenced stretched as she recalled being begged by her determined mother to come spend a summer with her. It was a request that took her completely off guard, she had never asked her to come back since she left, and one day out of the blue she was being begged back to Mississippi, to her childhood home. "I'm dying, Spencer."

Deflating, the attitude disappeared and as she observed her mother, looking for any trace of a sick joke or lie, even when she didn't see one, she refused to accept what she was hearing. "There must be a mistake."

Shaking her head from side to side, in a very calm casual way, the older blonde patted her hand. "I'm not scared. I'll enjoy heaven, and enjoy being closer to God." The optimism seemed genuine, but it didn't fix anything for her. "I'll enjoy being reunited with your brother and father."

"Let me fly you back to California with me." The pleas came out as quickly as the wheels could turn in her head. "I'll get you the best treatment-"

"It's too late."

"No." Why was she giving up so easily? She couldn't accept that. There must be something on the planet that could help her. "I want a second, third, fourth opinion. Let me take you out of the country somewhere. I can afford anything, Mother. Absolutely anything out there. We just have to..." She trailed off as an impulsive finger touched her lips.

"I don't want treatment. God has a plan for everyone, my baby, and if this is mine, so be it! I want to spend the rest of my life healthy, happy and with the many people I love." The finger fell to her hand, and once again she was patted there. "And that's why I wanted you here so badly."

Laying awkwardly in the tub, she leaned forward into her mother's arms. They had plenty of ups and downs and probably didn't talk as much as they should have, but they always reached a good place in the end and always loved each other dearly. "You're all I have left."

A kiss was placed in her hair. "Don't worry sweet baby, I'll come back as an angel and make sure to visit you in your sleep." She pulled away and cupped her daughter's cheek. "Is sleeping in bath tubs something you do normally?" Her mother always found a way to lighten the mood. "I wasn't expecting to have this talk with you in a bathroom like this."

"How do you think I feel?" Allowing her head to fall back, eyes landing on the shower head, she imagined the water falling onto her face and body, drowning everything out. "I wasn't expecting to have this talk at all."

"I did a lot of research on how to tell you." She admitted with a chuckle. "And I was on a cancer forum reading all these other parent's expierence just getting myself ready for what you might ask, I have note cards sitting in the other room."

"You should have gave me a heads up." Their eyes met as she turned her head, a smile corrupting the frown on her lips. "I would have prepared a power point presentation." The smile turned into a small chuckle. "I know some good medicinal marijuana dispenseries."

That got her mother laughing, "I have the bible, Spencer. I don't need marijuana." She became a bit more serious but kept a smile. "Do you want to ask me anything?"

"Is my room prepared?" In the back of her mind, she remembered the hotel reservation she made a week earlier. All the discomfort that revolved around being home didn't matter anymore. "I'm going to be here awhile."

"How long?" The excitement was easily seen in older blue eyes. "This isn't going to ruin your... Work, is it?"

Work. Spencer was always vague with her mother when it came to her career choice. Declaring herself a porn star, was entertaining, but there was so much more to it than that, and her mother would never, ever, know the depths and details of her work. "I can take as long as I'd like."

"Good!" The excitment grew and Spencer was finding it contagious. "I'm so happy you're home, my baby. We'll have so much fun out here, swimmin and pickin berries in the garden- Oh! Ashley's gettin married!..." Everything after that wasn't heard.

"Ashley's getting married?" She repeated slowly with fragments of the other night coming to mind- The word fiance didn't pop up anywhere, neither did an engagement ring- What did come to mind she really didn't want to think about... Of all the people in the world, she had to run into Ashley fucked up. And Ashley was... "Seventeen. She's seventeen and engaged?" Although she didn't know anything about Ashley, she knew there was something very wrong with the whole scenario. Most seventeen year olds couldn't decide who to take to prom, much less, know who they were going to spend the rest of their life with.

"They became engaged about two years ago." Paula explained casually as if fifteen year olds becoming engaged was an ordinary everyday thing. "She's marrying a really sweet boy named Levi James. Have you ever heard of him?" A head shake was her no and she was reminded of a hang over only bound to get worst. "He's her age moved here when they were about 12 and Raife has taken him under his wing. You should hear them two boys perform. They're good."

"Yeah. That could be fun." Las Angelas was seeming more and more inviting. The day had left her exhausted on top of already being exhausted. Her mother was sick and she was stuck in what seemed like the world's smallest town with a girl she had been a complete dick to moments before who she later found out was the same little girl that melted her heart over a decade ago. "I'm really tired, Mother. I'm going to get out of this tub and find somewhere to properly pass out."

With final good nights to her mother, and with her help, she left the safety of the bathroom and found her room untouched. There was a moment where she paused staring at her old computer before giving into her body's demands for sleep.

_The internet had become her escape. During the day, at sixteen, everyone knew her as a sweet Christian girl. But at night, when everyone was lost to a world of dreams, she remained awake until the sun came up. _

_The hours were spent only on one website, after awhile, she forgot where she even stumbled upon the link, but it kept her captivated. _

_Mesmerized. _

_All of the live shows starred a tall beautiful woman with light hazel eyes and jet black hair. Her outfits were always dark, powerful, and her victims always screamed._

Voices drew her out from a deep sleep, it took a second for her mind to catch up with her suroundings. Her old bedroom. She never imagined herself 28 years old sleeping in her old bed, with her old sheets. The feeling was as bizarre as the last couple of days.

Maybe today would be slower paced.

Normal.

Dragging herself out of bed, into the hallway, she walked into the kitchen eager to quench her thirst. The glass of ice water was downed with a quick series of swallows. As she placed the glass down, she could see the living room from where she stood.

Ashley sat with her mother and a small group of children on the massive floor rug. They all had the same colorful book in their lap, Spencer recognized it remembering the days where she and her mother did the very same thing. Five mornings out of the week Paula ran a small daycare that she helped with whenever she could. They would read biblical stories formatted for children in a special colorful book.

Watching Ashley teach a group of children the bible felt strange. It seemed like yesterday she was just a child herself listening to her read story after story. And now she was older, on the brink of adulthood, engaged, taking care of her mother like her mother had taken care of her as a small child.

_Glassy blue eyes opened, the strain on her face appeared out of the darkness and she stopped. "No!" The brunette pleaded moaning, she continued pumping her hips at her pleas slowing down a bit. _

_The cross sprawled across her naked chest captured her attention. She stared at it carefully the ecstasy enhancing its golden hue. The resemblence to the one she used to wear was uncanny. Her hand came up, the moans that weren't her own became more persistent. Unconsciously, she moved a bit quicker taking the golden charm between two fingers. _

_A final moan was heard and the legs tightly wrapped around her body began to quiver unrelentlessly. She released the charm as if it burned, staring strangely at the girl underneath her. _

_Her breathing was fast and uneven, and with closed eyes she continued to quiver. Spencer ran her fingers through the many curls, watching the girl slowly come down from a height her body had never expierienced before. _

_Their eyes met, and she fell deep into the brown orbs, stroking her face delicately, a couple of tears rolled down her cheek and she caught them never looking away. "You're magnificent." She kissed the flush cheek and allowed her head to fall onto her shoulder. "Striking." _

The memory came out of nowhere and she wanted to deny the night ever happened. Wanted to deny that in the middle of fucking someone she thought was a hot stranger, fucked out of her own mind, she discovered Ashley, and as her foggy mind began to clear, and the night reappeared to her, she began to remember everything and decided, she needed to take a drive.

The front door opened and a giddy red head appeared. Sarah was her southern best friend since she could remember. They grew up together, briefly dated in high school, and kept in touch over the years. She had a husband and three kids but he didn't seem to mind when they occasionally hung out or had sex.

He was never invited.

Spencer never dealt with men after her first early expierence. "Spencer! You gonna stick around this time?" The blonde laughed feeling a bit guilty for abandoning her friend the night before.

"Sorry." She greeted her in a hug and brief kiss before stepping inside. "You know I can't have a night out without something crazy happening." Walking to the kitchen, she opened a cabinet feeling arms wrap around her from behind. "Uh oh. Going straight for the liquor. Something must be wrong."

Downing a shot of vodka, she poured her friend a glass and then poured herself another. "My mother is sick." She took another shot drinking the poison like water. "Dying, I'm not sure from what. Cancer, I think." The woman kissed the top of her head holding her closer, she gave an apology. "She's in good spirits about it, actually. Said something about seeing my father and brother." She took another shot. "And that girl from the bar, the one I ditched you for, we know her." Facing her friend, bottle in hand, she watched green eyes move up in thought.

"I don't know." She gave up looking to her for answers.

"Ashley Davies." Saying the name sounded strange, and her friends eyes all of a sudden turned into giant saucers.

"Bull shit." She offered Sarah a swig of the bottle, taking one herself when declined. The blonde found herself wishing it was bull shit. Wished she had some kind of compulsive lying disease. "You kissed her." Sarah reminded reflecting on the night Spencer, her and a few other friends were supposed to have a good time in the French Quarter, let loose before she went to visit their old hometown. "And then brought her to the diner the next mor- You slept with her!"

Her eyes somehow managed to grow bigger than before, Spencer finished the vodka off already thinking of the next bottle... "I didn't sleep with her." She was starting to feel the alcohol, starting to notice her friends alluring body so close to her own. "Gabby did."

Green eyes rolled as she was pulled into the blonde's wanting body. "You're a mess, Spencer." Insistent lips traveled down her neck as skillful hands explored her body. "I thought she was engaged." Spencer didn't stop ripping her clothes off as she answered, "she is." Cupping a full breast, she captured her friends lips. "To Levi James." She answered the question she knew would come next. "I don't know who he is." Sarah loved knowing details.

"That makes no sense." She heard her friend say as she began kissing down her body. The blonde stilled in her movements and then stood up, going back to the liquor cabinet. "Why would she sleep with you if she's engaged?"

Leaning back against the kitchen counter, she opened a bottle of rum. "I'm not sure. I haven't spoken to her since I dropped her off." She poured the liquor into a taller glass this time. "I ran into her at my coming home party, and couldn't speak. I fled to the bathroom and passed out in the tub." She took a couple healthy swallows waiting for another onslaught of questions.

Sarah nodded in thought, looking down at her half naked body, she quickly looked back up at her. "Why'd you stop?"

Spencer closed the distance between them, luring her into the guest bedroom, she thought of all the different ways to keep her friend's mouth too busy to ask anything else.

She was done talking about Ashley for the day.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Thanks to everyone reading and reviewing. its greatly appreciated. :D**

_Life seemed difficult._

_As she sat alone by the Mississippi river, keys in hand, she couldn't ignore the overwhelming desire to just leave. Find a interstate and drive to wherever she was destined to be. _

_Looking toward the dark sky, to the thousands of stars, she spoke to her brother and father telling them everything on her mind. She used to come out there all the time, find her usual spot on the levy and speak to God. _

_But that all changed one night. _

_Spencer sighed closing her eyes, she laid on her back and turned her attention to the water. The current was so strong, it was fascinating to watch and wonder what it'd be like to be carried away by it. _

_Sarah wanted to date this boy, they laid in bed naked in each other's arms that morning when she told her. Suprisingly, she wasn't heartbroken or upset. Over the course of three months, they had referred to each other as their love, but Spencer was beginning to question the depth of their love. Was it love? _

_It couldn't be. _

_Releasing Sarah was too easy for it to have been true love, she was grateful her longtime friend told her first before messing around with the boy, and she kind of shrugged the whole thing off like it was no big deal. _

_And then there was Nixxie. _

_She had become obsessed with the extravagant woman adonning mostly leather and whips. More time had been spent researching her, finding out everything about her, she felt so drawn to this woman, someone she knew nothing about, someone private enough to keep her true identity sacredly hidden. _

_More than anything, she wanted to find out her real name. Take her out to brunch, and explore the depths of her mind. The feelings had become so real she often wondered if they knew each other in a past life or maybe they were soul mates. _

_The keys rattled in her hand, and inside the bag she wore everywhere was a debit card. At 16 she owned an account with her mother, and on the account was the money she received from her father's death. _

_She could leave tonight. _

_Maybe head to California. _

_Maybe find Nixxie._

_There wouldn't be a reason to say goodbye to her mother. Lately, they had been at each other's throats about everything. The cause of their tension, her girlfriend Sarah. The god devoted woman was finding it hard to accept that her seemingly perfect christian daughter had a thing for girls and not guys. _

_God, she hated her hometown. Sarah couldn't handle being looked at funny and spoken about behind her back. Her parents gave her hell when they found out, threatening to take away her car and put her out on the streets. Poor thing was terrified despite trying to sound all tough and non caring. Spencer knew that was the real reason behind their break up. Mitch Carey, the boy she supposedly liked, was a moron and it wasn't believable she'd willing leave her for him. _

_And then there was Ashley. _

_The other night she had accidentally picked up the house phone while her mother was in mid conversation with someone. Just as she was about to hang it up, she heard her name. The minutes that followed revealed she was speaking to Christine, Ashley's mother and Raife's manager. The five year old owned a huge chunk of her heart, she cared for the girl as If she were her own kid, and the more she listened to them, the more she wanted to slam the phone down and tear it out the wall. _

_Apparently, her relationship with Sarah had reached the wealthy woman's ears. The concerns being voiced to her mother were completely atrocious and she wanted to both scream and cry. She sat listening to Christine ask 'Do you think she'll touch Ashley inappropriately, if she already hasn't..." And although her mother did defend her, it was weak and she sounded very unsure. _

_The thought alone made her stand from the grass. If she wasn't leaving tonight, she might as well jump into the viscous waters of the Mississippi._

_She'd rather die than live another day around hateful small minded assholes. _

The harsh heat of the sun had caused her to wake up in a pool of her own sweat, a feeling she always despised. With closed eyes, she could hear the sound of rushing water, bringing on wave after wave of dread. The last thing she remembered was stumbling and falling into something... Mushy?

'Here we go.' Sitting up, she closely examined her body, wincing at the brightness of the day. Mud drenched what used to be a nice outfit, and she had the worst head ache imaginable. How she managed to climb around the levy in her heavily drunken state was a miracle.

Not falling into the river, an even bigger miracle.

The drive back to the white country house was miserable. Without her aviators shielding her from the sun, she didn't know how she would have been able to make it back without succumbing to the pain in her head.

The entire night was mostly a mystery. She knew she had sex with Sarah and then... And then... There was nothing. Making a mental note to text her friend later on, she pulled into the house's horse shoe driveway and then got out of the muddy jeep.

The house seemed mostly deserted as she ventured inside needing a long, cleansing, relaxing, bath. A sigh ecscaped her as warm soothing water enveloped her body, and she would have drifted off to sleep had she not heard the front door open and close.

With pruney fingers, she lifted her near perfect body out of the tub. She had dedicated her life to keeping in shape and looking as close to perfect as humanly possible. Living In Las Angela's, having the career that she had, being Gabriella Castel's ex- She wanted to be leaner, more toned, more tanned, and hotter than anyone else, especially Gabriealla.

Wiping down with a towel, she wrapped it around herself walking down the hall to her room. She dressed comfortably casual before venturing back out into the hallway. Walking three doors down, smiling at the movie she heard playing on the flat screen, she knocked briefly before walking in on her mother's command.

"Hey my baby." Paula greeted setting the magazine on her lap to the side. Spencer hadn't stood in the master bedroom in years. She had new furniture and pictures of the family everywhere. "Come here."

Maybe she sensed some discomfort, because she began patting the empty spot on the mattress beside her, flashing a warm smile. "Temperpedic." Spencer crawled up the king bed to where her mother's hand had beckoned her. "My momma don't play when it comes to her beauty rest."

There was a moment of surprise flashing through the older blonde's eyes. Spencer hadn't called her Momma since leaving town. Even as she said it, there was the barest hint of her old accent, she chuckled playing with her child's hair affectionately. "How do you think your Momma has managed to stay lookin so youthful, my baby." The gentle caress on her hair and face urged her tired eyes to close. The head ache seemed so much more bearable as she lied in the warm cozy bed curled up to her mother.

She felt like she'd been up for days.

"You grew up so fast." Just as she was about to sink into a deep sleep, she was pulled back to reality by her mother's thoughtful tone. "You always wanted to be grown." She chuckled softly. "Since the day you could talk all you wanted to do was grow up to be this or that, see this place or that place, start drivin on your own. There were days I wished you'd come to me and say, 'momma I just want to be your little girl forever."

"Momma." A sleepy smile graced her features as she began falling back into a world of dreams. "I just want to be your little girl forever."

And then she was gone.

Blinking the sleep out of her eyes, she stilled in her almost quick movements to get up. Being more careful not to wake her sleeping mother, she caught a glimpse of the several bottles of prescription medication before walking out of the room.

Feeling a little better, she brieftly went back into her bedroom grabbing a small leather bag. It was late afternoon, the sun was barely still up, creating the perfect setting for the two teens sitting by the pool. She watched them through the glass sliding door, watched as the gorgeous teenage boy strummed a guitar singing Into the brunette's eyes.

He was built like a football player, with bright brown eyes and dyed blonde hair. He reminded her of a male Taylor Swift.

Giving the kids their privacy, she went a different way out to the small barn. The tall wooden structure was designed for one horse and some chickens. They never bothered with farm animals, but as shit got tough to deal with living there, she would climb to the top of the loft part and smoke all of her troubles away.

Spencer didn't frequently use drugs, just alcohol, but she always had some pills or marijuana on hand for those extra stressful occasions. Packing a bowl, she leaned back against the barn wall taking the first delightful hit. With each hit, she ventured further and further down memory lane recalling coming up there to get high after church or after watching kids. Her life had split into two, and living a double life had become stressful and annoying. The closer she became to Sarah or Gabri- Nixxie, the farther she grew away from god and the people of Magnolia Mississippi.

Flicking the bic lighter alive once again, she brought the pipe to her lips, stopping at the sound of voices.

"I wish, I wish we could just be married already." A male voice nearly moaned and she really wished they would have just stayed by the pool. With an eye roll, she laid down on her back waiting for the teens to leave so she could continue, and praying they wouldn't decide to choose there and now to have sex.

"Soon." Was Ashley's breathless reply. The air was filled with their labored breathing and the sound of their hungry kisses.

Spencer was too stoned to pay attention to them. She burrowed deep into her high, trying to block them out.

"Levi, we have to stop, we have to stop. Not yet, not now."

There was heavy breathing breaking the silence of the barn. Spencer had no sense of time, how long the three of them stayed in there was lost on her, and how long she stayed in there after listening the their goodbyes was also unknown.

Finally alone, she packed another bowl and took three last hits, sitting there a little while before placing everything back into the leather pouch, and climbing down the loft's ladder.

Leaving shouldn't have been a big ordeal, she should have been able to walk right out and head to the kitchen with no questions asked. "W-what are you doing here?" But that simply wasn't the case. In the moonlight, she was met with Ashley's tear stained face, and Spencer swore she never cried this much as a small child.

"Not eavesdropping if that's what you're thinking." The answer was honest, a little on the goofy side but she was pretty high. "Do you want to talk about it?" The offer was genuine, she really never liked seeing the brunette upset. "He didn't hurt you, did he?"

She grew two and three heads again. "I can't deal with you right now." She sounded exasperated, completely stressed out of her mind. Spencer had to stop herself from packing a bowl for the clearly upset teen. "You're the last thing I need." She spoke more to herself as she tried to compose herself, looking down and wiping her face with her hands. "Just go."

Despite marijuanas influence on her mind, she started feeling bad. She thought back to the diner, and how angry the girl seemed. "I'm sorry for being a douche. You should hate me and never want to see my face again ."

"Where's the but?" She quietly asked continuing to stare down at the ground.

"There is none. I'm just being honest." While they were on the honesty subject, she felt it was a good time to say what the brunette probably never heard from anyone else in the small Mississippi town. "I don't think getting married is a good idea." She spoke casually but there was also a underline seriousness to the statement. "Why are you doing it?"

Her head snapped up to her and she seemed completely caught off guard by the question. "I- I love him." The answer was spoken a little too quickly, kind of defensive, not very convincingly, and it piqued Spencer's interest.

"I've never been in love." She lied leaning against the ladder she had climbed down from. "What's it like?"

"He makes me feel, makes me feel... Like there are butterflies around all the time." The blonde chuckled and couldn't help but intervene, "And when you kiss you see fireflies or something else equally as colorful and bright, right?"

Ashley didn't seem to share her humor. In fact, she seemed angry. "Not everyone wants to be like you."

There was disgust as she spoke, but that didn't phase Spencer. Behind dark aviators, she stared strangely at the teenage girl shooting bullets at her with her eyes. "No, not everyone wants to be like me." She repeated carefully. "They just want to act like me, isn't that right little girl?"

"That was a mistake." The brunette stood from where she sat and ran a nervous hand through her hair, seemingly stunned by her words. "That whole, that whole thing was a mistake." Again she spoke as if speaking out loud to herself. "You need help, Gab- Spencer." She turned in her direction finding her eyes. "Let me go over a few scriptures with you-"

"Hebrews 13:4 Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. Proverbs 11:3 - Honesty guides good people; dishonesty destroys treacherous people. Romans 1:26 For this reason God gave them up to dishonorable passions. For their women exchanged natural relations for those that are contrary to nature; 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God." A small sarcastic smirk shaped her lips. "Did you forget I used to teach YOU this shit?"

"Then why do you act the way you act?" She questioned seemingly genuinely confused. "Let me go over the bible with you again. Maybe you just need a fresh new start-"

The blonde smiled at the offer, smiled at the extent of the brunette's fear of sin. "I don't need to go over the bible with someone I slept with just a couple of nights ago, Ashley."

The brunette seemed flustered all of a sudden at the sound of her erotically spoken name. "I told you it was mistake-"

"No one's ever mistakingly fallen onto my dick, my darling." She moved from the ladder walking around the barn, casually keeping her eyes on the nervous teenage girl.

"Y- you seduced me!" She spat out all of a sudden stopping Spencer in her tracks. "Bu- but I don't blame you. The devil works in mysterious ways. You're just corrupt right now, but you can-" she stopped talking as the blonde closely approached her, taking the golden cross between two fingers, she carefully examined it.

Specially engraved onto the back of the charm were the letters SRC. "I can't believe you still wear this thing." The memory of her handing the little girl the necklace her dad had given to her played in her head. Ashley was so excited, so happy to be given something special of hers before she left.

"You were my hero." She hadn't expected that to come from the girl she stood incredibly close to. Slightly lifting her head to look into the face generously bathed in the moon's kind light, she gently tugged on the necklace urging the brunette closer to her.

"And now I'm Satan." Their faces were so close so incredibly close that their breaths mingled. She searched, looking for any signs of discomfort or disgust, there was nothing but a sense of awe and apprehension. "What were you doing on Bourbon street, Ashley? Alone without your fiance... were you bored of reliving the same day, day after day? Were you looking for an escape? Were you looking for excitment? Something completely out of the ordinary to add some kind of spice that you're life was lacking-"

"Stop." She was becoming angry again a fire lighting in her eyes. "You don't know me! You don't know anything about me!"

"You're wrong. I do know you." She released the brunette, carefully watching her as she put distance between them. "Whatever the reason you're marrying this boy, Its not a good idea."

"It's what I want and and what you think really doesn't matter. I know when I've made a mistake and God knows I'm human, I'm willing to never sin again in that... Way. I don't care what you say. We both know your lifestyle Is wrong in his eyes and I'm not okay with that behavior." With those words, Ashley walked out of the barn hastily, never meeting her eyes as she spoke.

Spencer stared after her, smirking.


End file.
